Why is it everyone around you has an opinion on your divorce and how and when you should see your children? If you are anything approaching a good parent; you should be seeing your children every weekend and if possible every day? Even Maintenance Enforcement has an opinion, “MEP affects your life. Your children are important” and right below that statement is this one, “The Alberta Maintenance Enforcement Program (MEP) is authorized by the Alberta Maintenance Enforcement Act to ensure that individuals meet their obligations to pay spousal and child support under the terms of their court orders and certain agreements. Once an order or agreement has been registered with MEP, maintenance payments that the debtor (payor) would normally pay directly to the creditor (recipient) are sent to MEP. MEP then forwards the payment to the creditor once the funds have cleared through a trust account.” Heads up people in Enforcement, if you take everything the Dad has, including his drivers license, how is he going to see anybody?
I was having lunch with some friends earlier this week and up came the question, “How often do you get to see your children?” All eyes centered on me, waiting for me to tell them how I had set aside my life to pursue those futile few hours to spend with my children. Okay, I wanted to say,
“Hands up how many are you divorced?”
“Hands up how many have suffered through years of abuse during their marriage”
“Hands up how many got a beating on their last day of marriage before they escaped their house?
“Hands up how many are paying better than 60% of their net income to the individual who perpetrated this shit?”
My point being, so many outsiders are quick to pass summary judgment on you. Yes, I agree the children are very important however if I don’t take care of myself, they won’t have a father. One more important opinion for those of you out there that like to pass out this snap judgments on marriage, divorce, abuse, violence, children, neglect or anything related to another person’s life”
“It’s none of your god-damn business.”
Repeat after me again – “It’s none of your god-dam business.” And why isn’t any of your business because you have not walked a mile in their shoes or my shoes. Do you have a degree in psychology? Have you spent months helping me through this pain – NO. So if you really were my friend, you would shut up and just support me.
I can’t tell you the countless times someone has asked me if I see my children. It’s a heartless question and it’s insensitive. Really in order for me to tell you how many times I see my children you have to be clued in what happened, the years of abuse, and the violence. It’s not something I am interested in summing up for you in a coffee shop over a couple of lattes. Really, the reason you ask this question is to determine if I am continuing to be a good father, your question is one of judgment on another and it’s a thoughtless question. People who ask me this question, need a good smack (ah, there I go, perpetuating violence) but it’s a sore point with me.
One final thought for the dimwitted. I do see my children and it is painful. Why? Because the abuse continues on my children. Ah, you say, Mr. Legalprison, why don’t you stop this, report her? Lord knows I tried and failed in every option. I spoke to lawyers, and child psychologists. If you read any of previous postings you would know she is a master manipulator and much better than I at fighting and winning this battle. I hate losing and I hated losing this battle. There isn’t a moment I didn’t apologize for my children for leaving them in that environment. Yes, I failed and why don’t you push into my face every time you ask how often I see my children?
Next posting – Teen Pregnancy
